I became aware of some new pregnancies over these past few weeks. Hearing about them still stings. Being told about them in person is a lot better than seeing a post on facebook. When I see an ultrasound picture or an announcement on facebook, I feel like they're shouting this news at me. HA! LOOK WHAT I DID! I GOT PREGNANT AND I AM SO CONFIDENT ABOUT THIS PREGNANCY THAT I AM GOING TO ANNOUNCE IT TO THE WORLD AND FILL UP YOUR NEWSFEED WITH PICTURES SO YOU WON'T MISS IT! AND THEN EVERYONE WILL COMMENT ON MY AMAZING PICTURES AND THOSE COMMENTS WILL SHOW UP IN YOUR NEWSFEED TOO! MWAHAHAHAHA!
Obviously that is not true (I hope?), but that's how it feels, and it makes me want to run away and hide. Or say fuck you. Losing a child is not fun. TTC and failing every single month is not fun. It just seems so foreign and shocking to hear about another pregnancy and to see such confidence these women have that they're willing to share this information with the world. Just because you're past 12 weeks doesn't mean you're safe. Not to instill worry into anyone who is pregnant, but being pregnant doesn't always equal a live baby in the end.
I just wonder when it will stop hurting. When hearing about someone's pregnancy will make me smile instead of cringe.
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